Madame DeChevre & the Silk Scrolls

 Oh God this is great. Just what I need; this is just what I need. Ok take it easy, I’m sure it’s nothing. Probably rats on the track. We’re stopping for rats. Oh God, it’s so crowded. How could the be so many people? This guy really smells. Doesn’t anyone use deodorant in this city? What is so hard, you take the cap off you roll it on?! What’s that?! I feel something rubbing against me! Such disgusting animals; these people should be in a cage… We are in a cage! What if I miss the wedding? I’ve got the ring, what would they do? You can’t get married without a ring. Oh, I can’t breathe! I feel faint. Ok, take it easy; it’ll start moving soon. Uh, think about people in concentration camps; what they went through. And the hostages! What would you do if you were a hostage?! Think about THAT! This is NOTHING! Uh, NO! It’s not nothing, it’s SOMETHING! IT’S A NIGHTMARE! HELP ME! MOVE IT! C’MON MOVE THIS ********* THING WHY ISN’T IT MOVING?! WHAT COULD GO WRONG WITH A TRAIN IT’S ON TRACKS?! THERE’S TRAFFIC HOW COULD A TRAIN GET STUCK?! STEP ON THE GAS! WHAT COULD IT BE?! You think the conductor would explain it to us! “Sorry there’s a delay we’ll be moving in FIVE MINUTES!” I want to hear a voice! WHAT’S THAT ON MY LEG?! 

I will try to remember this when I am on the bus to school having a panic attack. Julie Louis-Dreyfus will comfort me in my time of need.

(via pitypiie)